"my world"

Sorry for the long hiatus but the last couple of months had been busy, worried, and just full of life. My latest headache is school. If it's one thing its the other, I just can't catch a break from my non-understanding community college. Due to the lack of caring employees at the financial aid office my paper work was lost and I came home empty handed for financial aid. After finally talking to a person that cared it still didn't help my cause. Last fall semester was hard for me in school, life, and fatherhood. Wife was deployed for a month with the national guard, the V.A. dropping the ball on not been prepared to deal with the new G.I. Bill. Dealing to buy a books for school or feed the family with that money. I got a lot of fucking titles. Never the less I'm fighting, not winning. It takes a definite number of battles to win the war. I'm fighting a war of attrition. No matter how much it hurts it will be won. Since, I failed last semester the financial aid had a "real excuse" to turn me down. They simply didn't want to admit they screw up my paper work when I was a well qualified candidate. What's one more year of been poor. Good thing I got a lot of experienced on that, not my wife though. I make sure to tell her it's not the end of the world, but it's just another pebble on the path we walk together. We still got each other for support and communication. Family is in good health. I'm just grateful to what I have.

Born in the second poorest country in Latin America, survived two wars, one as a child and the other as an adult. It has made me understand what life is really about. My wife grew up without her government been corrupt, no civil war to experience and most of all she is "We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America." That sums up my wife, Alisha. I really respect that about her.

I really do see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm just tired of walking to it.

I came to the conclusion that I won't have the great civil engineering carrier I was after. It wasn't for the lack of trying, just the realization of "who" I'm really are as a person. Plan B. I have experienced life in many different environments that some have not and that road leads me to teaching. I'm sure my "two cents" will make one a dollar. I want to end up as a professor for a community college or teach at a well known college. The ones that "mommy and daddy" paid their kids to go to, so they can put their "tech" sticker on the family minivan.

Looking back at it now it would have been better for me to get my A.A. in liberal arts instead of engineering. Aim high, if that doesn't work then one knows the way down. Going for the gold has cost me a lot of headaches and the realization of the bullshit bureaucracy of college.

After dropping out of high school I went to Nova, I studied what I wanted and when I wanted it and not caring if I passed or failed. I wanted to educate my self and taste it for my self. Once I stopped going to Nova (Northern Virginia community college) my G.P.A classified me as a student that only achieved 0.9 . The "bureaucrats" didn't understand the person just the number and they based their thinking's on that. What a waste of college educated staff and judging a book by its cover. They simply don't want to turn the page or should I really say listen to the person.

When I came back to Nova, I made the Dean's list and other achievements that I did not seek or wanted. The "bureaucrats" love what a great turn around I achieved, but I was still the same guy. I hate tittles. That's all the masses see. Look and listen at the person and judge it for one's self.

I'm only after learning and expanding my horizons. This world loves to give out tittles left and right. I'm the kind of person that could care to shits about tittles. The only tittle I really seek is been the best dad to my kids. To the general masses that like tittles to measure a man's worth they will see it hanging on wall of my bathroom.