blackberry update

Got time to kill at the doctor's office, I'm here for my daughter's appointment.
Computer still down, now the internet is down. Comcast sucks. They have been to my nice ghetto apartment twice and have come up with two different solutions that did not accomplished anything other than to assure me they got people working with no actual knowledge of one's job.

Back to the doctor's office, still fucking waiting. Plus, kids getting on my nerves. The price of been a father sometimes sucks, hallmark hasn't come up with a card to ease my pissed off attitude.

comp issues

I hate computer viruses, this is why my writing has not been read.
I would like to thank the creators of the blackberry. Small ass key pad for writing a blog. Feels good to get something out at least, but typing with one finger is not fun.

Don't think my mind is empty, it's just handicapped because some dumb ass likes to fuck with other people computers.

Boy, it feels good to write. I'll try my new challenge.

Update

Just to let one know that I been busy, lazy and can't seem to finish my blogs.
I have several that I'm working on. Don't worry, one will hear the voices in my head and I'll put them down on paper.

"Text to think about"

After creating my blog I emailed my mentor. I wanted to let her know what I started. Once, I let the cat out of the bag, I wanted to know one's reaction two seconds ago. I'm always curious about what one's answer will be like. Is this the first step of a writer? I wanted to know like a curious kid not as an adult. The anticipation was standing right next to me.

Finally, after getting the blog address right, he was able to read my blogs. I butchered my own introduction as a blogger. The first text, I realized that I wrote it incorrectly, forgot the f on after. On the second text I forgot the dot. But, the third was my awakening. I can say this with a smile on my face, I still haven't gotten my blog address down pat. As evidence been exposed to one's eyes.

" I got it now.... This is some deep shit.... Y do it?" that was his reply after the third text.
I felt the shock wave hit me hard, just like my first I.E.D. (Improvised, Explosive, Device)

I don't have a simple answer to that. A good bull shit answer is "it just came to me" but I don't have a bull shit answer, at least not this time. I know too well it's a rather complex answer to be answered now, only time will reveal the verdict. How about these for now: Life gives me pleasure to write about. Emotion has a voice in my writing. Experiences I had. I'm sure that their is more than that but I don't see them yet. Could this be my calling? I don't know, let me go answer the phone.


INSIDER INFORMATION - I made a rule about the blog, that I would be honest with my writing.

"Mirror"

In the army one tends to hide one's feelings. If shown then one seems weak. Was it worth it for for me? I don't know. This question will be answered throughout my life.

In the Army it seemed that they did not want me to be human. A soldier is what they demanded and wanted, not excuses. So, I became a soldier without really knowing the transformation happening within me. Wish I could have known about the transformation. I would have wanted more. Can't be explained, but one feels it inside. One is forever different. I am no longer Bosco, he's the saint that's keeping an eye out for me. Now, I am Jerez.

Can't really complaint because infantrymen don't complaint, but I know what I experienced. The good about life and the shit for the dead. "shit, why him?" then a moment of silence would blanket my mind. A sad voice inside my head answered, "shit, I don't know" The thoughts I had in war with a empty heart. On the other hand, The only loud voice the guys heard coming from me was "better him then me." But, that wasn't the full sentence I heard in my mind. "Better him then me, I'm still in fucking Mosul."

So, basically the time I have left on earth will lead to the full understanding of the soldier I was once. Back then one did not think of the future, sure they might have talked about it but one knew not to cry over spilled milk. Hope hurts, it can make one go crazy in war. It almost got me.

Born

I beleave that one's death and creation are already written. The problem is that everybody wants to know when they die. Don't live in fear, enjoy each day that is granted in one's life.

If I had the chance, I would pass on reading the last entry. Don't care about the day I die, it's already taken care of. Just going to enjoy life, a day, a moment.

I love you.

"Breaking the mold, not by choice"

I'm trying to remember when I broke the mold. I remembered been the "poster boy" for don't do drugs they are bad for you, speech. Would it be, when I used to smoke an oz. a week back in the good old days. How about dropping out of high school on my senior year, I just didn't buy the idea of one is nothing without one. Wait, I got a good one for you, it might be the time when I said........

" I, Bosco, do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God." How about that, yep me "La serpiente emplumada."

That sounded good, right? The question that I'm curious about is when will I set the mold.


F.Y.I.

I came up with the idea while trying to decide what to write about. I started thinking of the person I am. A little bit of this, a little bit of that, and realized I broken alot of molds through out my short life. People have been surprised of the shit I done. So, I leave one with that.

If one ever done the oath then this will make one laught and bring good memories to one's soul.. .................http://usmilitary.about.com/od/militaryhumor/a/newoaths_2.htm